This might just be growing up
The thought ‘when am I going to get a break from this’ popped into my head the other day. The sort of thought that creeps into a weary and tired mind. The sort of thought that seems to follow on the heels of lots of ‘things to do’ ‘challenges to be got through’ and if we are all honest 18months of lots of unmet needs. The kind of period that reminds of the simple pleasure of being able to go out for dinner. Something I realise now is such a privileged thing to miss.
But I digress. The question remains – when does the break come? The Answer? I am not sure it does.
Things of course change constantly. But I wonder that we have this idea of life being easy, relaxed, uncomplicated, problem free. And what I realise is often if the problems don’t find their way into our lives, we make them for ourselves. Not the life is bad or painful, far from it. In fact I would like to believe that life can be joyful, and we can lead enjoyable lives. But that there will be repeatedly be things to work out, there will always be food to make, dishes to wash, bills to pay, co-workers/partners/customers approach to navigate, needs to meet and be met. It might feel a bit incomplete, a little rocky. This might just be growing up and being aware of the world as it stands. Which means instead of hoping for the things to end instead we need to find a way to let the challenges weigh a little lighter. To not but up against all challenges and things to be done as wrong, but instead navigate them with as much ease as we can muster.
It is where resilience meets a Pollyanna approach. Finding the goodness and moving forward with the small pleasures that sneak their way amongst days of endless meetings, unhelpful customer service calls, cleaning the bathroom and well everything else that takes the shine of being a grown up. Coming back time and time again to what really matters to us and choosing that. This week I heard the quality of our life depends on whether we look at things as relationships or transactions. Are they opportunities to connect or things to be done. Through this lens even the boring, relentless feeling of adulting can become a choice to learn more, take notice, and connect in small ways with others or ourselves.
What do you think?